Question: You get into a relationship and it has been exactly 2 days 6 hours and 22 minutes. You then proceed to… 

A. Post all of your selfies together on Instagram

B. Max out all 140 of your characters on twitter declaring your undying love for them 

C. Teach the whole of Facebook on the importance of “finding the one”.

Sound familiar? That’s modern couple culture for you. Don’t get me wrong, some couples are adorable, but I’m talking about the ones who are constantly gushing about their special someone… only to separate in a week. 

The ones who change their cover picture to something completely sappy to proclaim their love for each other, posting pictures of them together with the caption “This guy <3” (honestly, who made that saying up and why has it become the international online phrase of couple-dom?). 

Something just seems so cheesy and in-your-face when someone uses social networking sites to express their love for each other. It’s like having a hall full of thousands of people and standing on a podium to proclaim, “I LOVE YOU. LESS THAN THREE”.

Besides the ones mentioned above, here are some of the top things that are the most annoying between couples online:

1.       Paragraph statements clearly more suitable for a private chat as status updates

2.       Use of the word “bb” or “bae”  

3.       Overuse of unintelligent hashtags

4.       Pictures of them holding hands (that is just so cliché, come on guys)

5.       “2 week anniversaries”

6.       Piggy-backing/walking on the beach pictures that requires a third person to take the photo

There’s real reason why these displays of affection annoy me so. Most high school relationship fail. Unless you are positive that you two are meant to be (and there is really no way of being certain), you don’t want to have him/her following you around for the rest of your life. It’s like tattooing their name onto you virtual self.

The moral of the story is kids, don’t be stupid online, especially about relationships. Or maybe rather, don’t be that bitter girl, in her room, typing furiously in hopes to rid the world of happiness through a school newspaper article.

By: Jiyu Nam